I had the TV on to Dr. Phil today ( which aired June 2, 2009 and can be found on www.drphil.com/shows) while working on my computer and couldn't believe my eyes and ears when I saw and heard the man say that he decided not to take responsibility for a child after it was evident he was the biological father of this child.
This man named Matt has actually spent thousands of dollars in legal fees fighting his right to not take responsibility for his child. His case has been (rightfully so) thrown out of court numerous times. His mother Diane was defending him. While watching the show, I saw why Matt was so self-absorbed and arrogant and carried the aura of "I'm entitled". Probably because Diane treated him like he was the only one that mattered in the whole world. He said when he had consensual sex with the woman, it was not their intent to conceive.
Another man Noel was on the show with his wife Nicol. Noel found out two years after his biological child was born that he had a child with his ex-girlfriend. Nicole actually had the nerve to say something like this, "Why should I have to take financial responsibility for this child?"
Noel said something similar yet equally stupid. He said something like, "I already have two children who I care for and love and support. I choose not to support this child that I helped conceive with my ex."
Okay! I wanted to strangle these people. Are they seriously hearing themselves talk? Were they dropped on their heads as children?!! In fact, there are other things I want to do to these people which would probably get me arrested. (If there were no consequences, I would do it. Since I have common sense, I won't do it but only dream about it) If nothing else, I would yell at these people and ask, "Are you f**king retarded?!"
We understand something that the rest of these idiots don't understand: common sense. When a baby is born, the biological father is legally bound to provide financial support to the child. With every action and decision made, there are consequences. When a baby is born, whether planned or not, it is the responsibility of both parents to ensure the child is safe and protected.
It takes two to tango. Just because a woman is on The Pill or the man wears a condom does not mean pregnancy will not occur. Gloria Allred, a well-known attorney who has appeared on numerous TV programs, said it best: There is no such thing as protected sex. When a father decides to not be a father to the child, it makes the baby an undeserving victim.
The man helped create that child. As did the mother. It is up to both parents to ensure the child is cared for.
Thanks to Matt, Noel and the many other dead-beat dads out there, the numbers for single parent households in this country continue to increase with negative results according to the official Web site of the National Fatherhood Initiative (www.fatherhood.org)
According to a report by the U.S. Census Bureau published on its web site, more than 25 million children live apart from their fathers. That is 1 out of 3 children in this country. Children in father-absent homes are more likely to be poor. In 2002, 7.8 percent of children in married-couple families were living in poverty, compared to 38.4 percent of children in female-householder families.
During the year before their babies were born, 43% of unmarried mothers received welfare or food stamps, 21% received some type of housing subsidy, and 9% received another type of government transfer (unemployment insurance etc.). For women who have another child, the proportion who receive welfare or food stamps rises to 54%.
The web site also stated that being raised by a single mother raised one's risk of teen pregnancy, marrying with less than a high school degree, and forming a marriage where both partners have less than a high school degree.
Now even if the mother and father decide not to stay together, fathers must still take responsibility for the children they helped procreate by supporting the child financially, emotionally, socially and much more.
Men, the next time, you have sex, understand there is still that chance your girlfriend, wife, sex buddy or one-night stand will get pregnant. If you're not ready for that responsibility, remember this quote best stated by an ambushed pedophile on Chris Hanson's "To Catch a Predator" which airs on MSNBC: Keep your genes in your jeans.
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